The Same Rhythm
by xfirefly9x
Summary: House/Cuddy. A collection of ficlets based on the relationship between House and Cuddy. Some chapters contain spoilers! Warnings for such are included at the beginning of every chapter.
1. The Same Rhythm

**_The Same Rhythm_**

His heart is a black lump in his chest. It has seen and lost love and felt the thin, icy fingers of love at work wrap tightly around it, suffocating it.

All that remains of a once alive, red, beating heart is a broken, cynical corpse. All that remains is seething pain and hatred.

Her heart is blackened by her view of love. The perfect emotion she had dreamed of as a child has given her nothing but wasted time and loneliness. She has learnt that the child she had been was naïve and so very wrong.

Love is not perfect, nor is it easy. It is far from it. It is blunt and sharp and hot and cold.

Together, their hearts pound to the same deadly rhythm.


	2. Up To Something

**_Up To Something_**

"House," she calls to him wearily. "What are you smiling at?" She replaces the file she'd been viewing at the nurses' station and makes her way over to him through the usual bustle of doctors and patients alike.

He begins walking immediately.

Away from her.

"House!" She picks up her pace and arrives at the elevator just as the doors are closing on him. She throws her hands into the decreasing space and opens them.

She steps in beside House and smiles at the scowl he fixes her with.

"Now," she says. "Let me try that again. What the hell are you up to?"

He shrugs, gives her one of his most infuriating, blank stares. "Nothing."

"You were smiling," she deadpans. "Either hell is about to freeze over or you're up to something."

He doesn't say anything.

She frowns at him.

They reach his floor, the elevator pings and the doors slide silently apart.

Finally, he locks eyes with her and his smile returns, threefold at the very least. He makes sure there are a few doctors and nurses in earshot and then pointedly says, "I'm surprised you aren't smiling too after last night."

His smug grin is the last thing she sees before the doors close on her once more.


	3. No Place Else

**_No Place Else_**

Fallen leaves, orange and brown and red, skitter across the ground. There is a gentle breeze that every few seconds changes direction and sends them spiralling, weaving, in, out, in, out, in out around invisible obstacles. The air is crisp.

Cuddy sits on a bench and watches the leaves in their imitation of a dance, in their last hours before they settle and decompose. Her mind is blank. There is time only to enjoy the beauty of nature at it's finest. There is time only to sit and watch and breathe.

She hears the crackling of leaves underfoot and turns to see House, ambling slowly in her direction. He _looks_ quiet. _Feels_ quiet. Somehow. There is not dangerous glint in his eyes, not does he wear a smirk to suggest he's up to something that she wouldn't approve of. He simply is.

He closes the distance between them in four easy steps and them lowers himself down to sit beside her. He smiles at her softly. Rakes his eyes over her for a moment. Leans back to rest his back on the edge of the table behind them and stares aimlessly into space.

A smile creeps onto her face as she focuses back on the leaves. She breathes in deep.

There's no place else she'd rather be.

_fin._


	4. Burn For You

_**Burn For You**_

"I burn for you. You burn for me. How about we get it on?"

Cuddy glances up from her paperwork to stare at House. She rolls her eyes. "How very poetical of you. Did you make that up yourself?"

He ignores her and limps closer, using his cane for support. He pierces her with a look that even she cannot hope to equal. He runs his tongue over his lips.

"Well?" he says. "How about it?"

She raises an eyebrow and continues to study him. "You're not kidding, are you?"

His silence is enough answer.

"House, I… I don't know what to say. I mean, quite clearly you've lost your mind. You can't possibly think I'd say yes to – "

His lips crash into hers before she can utter another word and to her surprise, she finds that she doesn't care. She melts into his embrace, lets him pull her closer and…

THWACK!

"Cuddy, sleeping on the job now, are we?" the object of her dream rudely interrupts. He's wearing a sneer that she knows will only intensify if he is to become aware of her 'fantasy' for want of a better word.

She blinks wearily at him and covers a yawn with the palm of one hand. "What do you want, House?" she asks. Annoyed. Very annoyed.

He hesitates for a second too long and then smiles at her.

She begins to worry.

"I burn for you," he begins. "You – "

She slaps a hand over her face and lowers her head to the desk. "Oh, god."

House pauses in his words of prose to smirk at her. "Has anyone ever told you that you talk in your sleep, Cuddy?"

_fin._


	5. Uncertainties Made Certain

**_Uncertainties Made Certain_**

She had always wanted to be a mother. The idea of bringing life into the world, nurturing it and caring for it had set the desire firmly in her mind.

She wanted a child.

She really, really, more than anything wanted a child and so when she was a month late, it was all she could think about.

Was she pregnant?

Had her time come?

She hoped so but was at the same time cautious of getting too excited.

It could be a false alarm.

If it wasn't though, if it was really happening, what would the father think?

Would he feel as strongly about it as she?

Would he be okay with it?

Would he?

There was only one way to be sure.

After she took a pregnancy test (her hands trembled from the moment she opened the box to the moment she got her answer), she headed for his office.

He glanced up when she lingered in the doorway and raised an eyebrow. "Cuddy?"

She could feel her eyes well up as she told him. "House, I'm pregnant. We're gonna be parents."

She allowed the excitement to set fully in when he smiled.

_fin._


	6. Weightless

**Warning:** T+ (adult themes)

**_Weightless_**

She loses sight of the ground.

Gravity no longer exists.

All that matters is how she feels and how she yearns for it to never end.

Her heart is beating against her chest like a bird trying to escape its cage. She can feel her blood as it journeys through her veins; she can almost see each and every cell that makes up her body. And his body.

She can't feel the floor beneath her feet and she knows that it doesn't matter. She is weightless and she is with him and it has to be a dream. It has to be.

She opens her eyes just enough to tell that this is actually happening. It's as real as the pounding of her heart. Light filters in and then everything is blue and she forgets what she was thinking about because his lips are on hers once more, her lips are on his.

She wonders passingly before the feelings overcome her thoughts entirely if she'll ever know the feeling of solid ground beneath her feet again.

She hopes not.

_fin._


	7. Ice Cream

**_Ice Cream_**

A lot of people would do anything in winter to have just one warm, summery day to enjoy. After days of freezing temperatures, it was only natural. The human body was designed more able to stand heat than cold.

Usually Cuddy was one of those people. Not today.

The entire week had consisted of sweltering, uncomfortable days and she was sick of it.

The constant sweating and using antiperspirant sprays to cover it up was driving her slowly to the edge of sanity, almost as much as the snide comments House had thrown her way as he leered at her choice of clothing: low cut tops and skirts that rose a little above her knees, higher than her usual.

She'd do anything for a frozen yogurt or some…

"Ice cream?" House limped into her office, holding precariously in one hand, two cones dripping with vanilla. How he'd managed not to drop them was beyond her.

Despite her desire to yell at him for dripping all over the place, all Cuddy could do was smile.

Maybe, just maybe, this would make up for the heat: House being nice, for once.

Maybe the weather wasn't so bad, if it meant House would be bringing her cool treats.

She ran her tongue over her lips and nodded.

"You read my mind."

_fin._


	8. Her Greatness

**_Her Greatness_**

"You are one evil, cunning woman. It's a massive turn on."

Her heart leaps in her chest and her eyebrows shoot skyward.

House raps his cane on the ground.

She fixes him with a questioning stare. "What did I do this time?"

He smirks at her. "Oh, I think you know."

She doesn't.

"Tell me anyway."

He studies her with eyes of ice blue.

"House?"

"The evil, cunning one needs to be told of her greatness? I'm disappointed."

She frowns at him.

And then she remembers.

She'd cut Foreman's pay back slightly to allow for a raise for House's new team.

"Oh!"

"I owe you many thanks," he tells her almost mockingly.

She shakes her head and tries not to smile. "You do? Really?" She doesn't bother with the 'why's'. She's already certain it has something to do with making Foreman miserable.

He nods.

"In that case," she says slyly while eyeing her desk, "I can think of a few things you could do as thanks."

_fin._


	9. It's You

**_It's You_**

"C'mon, admit it," she teases. "You have a crush. Even just a little one."

House frowns at her and raps his cane on the edge of her desk. He doesn't answer.

"Ooooh, scary. You hit my desk with your cane!"

His frown turns to a glare.

"Admit it and I won't bug you about it anymore."

"Admit what?"

"That you have a crush," she grins at him. "Who is it? Who is it that has somehow found a way to melt your heart of ice?"

He scowls. Narrows his eyes. Sighs loudly.

"You."

"What?"

"You. It's you."

Her eyes widen.

_fin._


	10. Guilt Ridden

**_Guilt Ridden_**

Another late night at the office.

Cuddy sighed.

It had become a ritual the past few nights. She would finish up her work for the day as usual, on the usual time, and then she would return to her office and just sit there.

It wasn't like she had been slacking off and leaving paperwork to finish from earlier in the day, although she might as well start doing so just so she'd have an excuse should anyone find her there.

She was conflicted, it was that simple.

The guilt from not telling House the truth had been eating at her gut since the very moment she had agreed with Wilson that it could potentially help to ground him. Instead of going home to dwell on it, she preferred keeping her work at work and so, remained in her office to do so.

Not telling House the truth, she was certain would backfire at some point. He'd find out eventually knowing him.

Until he did, would it really help him?

For all she knew, it could make things worse.

Rather than making him more aware that he could make mistakes and kill people, perhaps he would become more reckless.

Maybe he'd lose whatever it was that made him the great doctor he was.

She hoped from the bottom of her heart that it wouldn't come to that. She had seen the man destroyed so many times before that she was certain that the pieces left to pick up if it should happen again would be impossible to fit back together.

If she were the one to break him, she'd never forgive herself.

She sighed into her hands and let her head drop to her desk.

Until House found out, she wasn't going to get a proper nights' rest, of that she was sure.

_fin._


	11. You Want Me

**_You Want Me_**

"Do you like me, House?" Cuddy asked him, almost…hopefully?

He stared at her wide-eyed and shifted from one foot to the other. "Do I like you?" he repeated with a forced smirk. He reached one hand up to fiddle with his ear.

Cuddy shot him a defiant look, her no-nonsense, mess-with-me-and-you'll-be-sorry look. "Exactly," she said firmly, "because as I've said about several other dates that you cunningly sabotaged, only someone who cares about my wellbeing or someone who wants me for themselves would go to the trouble of interrupting as you've done."

She paused and smiled when he flinched slightly. "You're not one of the people who care about my wellbeing obviously, or you wouldn't do or say half the things that you do, so that can only mean – "

"That I want you for myself," House finished for her, voice dripping with annoyance. "You'd like that, wouldn't you?" he went on.

Cuddy raised an eyebrow. "C'mon. Admit it," she pressed. "Be a man. You want me."

"I don't."

"Seriously, House. You've intentionally ruined more dates I've had than I can remember. You want me."

He shook his head and a small smirk formed on his face. "You want me to want you."

She stared at him. "I didn't say that – "

"You want me to want you," he said again, firmly.

"And you want me," she said quietly.

Their eyes locked.

As one, they broke away.

House headed for the door, Cuddy to her desk.

"No," she murmured, dismissively. "No way."

House glanced back at her and shook his head. "Not a chance."

_fin._


	12. Running

**_Running_**

He places the earphone buds of his iPod into his ears one at a time, the left one first and then the right one. Flicking the iPod on, he presses 'play' and soothing jazz music fills his ears.

He smiles and palming a bottle of water on the way, heads for the door. No. He _walks_ to the door. He can walk now, thanks to the ketamine treatment Cuddy slipped him while he was injured. Though still pissed at her for acting without his consent, it had its benefits.

Had he not been able to walk again, he'd not have gotten up quite so early. He'd still be asleep. He'd not have been able to go out and run.

Closing the door behind him, he practically leaps down the stairs and out onto the street. His feet slap the pavement, left, right, left, right, left, until they fall in with the pounding of music in his ears.

He runs.

By the time he's reached Cuddy's house, sweat beads his forehead and soaks through his shirt at the armpits. His back is slick with sweat. His muscles are burning pleasantly. His lips form a smile.

"House! What the hell are you doing?" Cuddy yells at him the moment she opens the door.

Still, he smiles.

He looks Cuddy over. She is wearing a pale blue singlet top over matching pyjama bottoms. Nice.

"House!" A warning. "It's 4am."

He shrugs and turns to leave. Before he does, he answers her initial question, trying not to grin too much like a maniac as he does so.

"I'm running."

_fin._


	13. Evil, Cunning…

_**A/N: **This is one of my personal favourites. Enjoy! And feel free to send me a prompt or two for future installments. ;)_

**_Evil, Cunning…_**

"You don't have to treat me like a baby," House says with a childish scowl. He crosses his arms over his chest and aims a glare at Cuddy, his eyes icy and bluer than usual.

Cuddy smiles calmly back at him from where she's perched on her desk. It's a smile that suggests she hasn't had so much fun in years. "I know I don't have to, and if you'd quit acting like one, I wouldn't." She leans back slightly, hands supporting her on either side.

"I have to admit though, this is…hmmm," she ponders. "What's the word? Fun? Yes. I think that's it."

"Fun? This is your idea of fun?" House exclaims. "Now who's the childish one?" He makes an awkward jerking motion as if he'd been about to move but changed his mind at the last possible second. Perhaps the glint in Cuddy's eyes had something to do with his hesitation.

Evil woman. Evil, cunning…

"How much longer do I have to stay here?" he whines. "My patients need me." The last words drip sarcasm.

Cuddy pushes away from the desk and begins to pace the stretch of floor in front of House. She pauses on her second lap and pierces House with a look.

"How long you stay there depends on how long it takes for you to turn around as I requested and stand in silence. You're at fifteen minutes now and you're not leaving until you're done. I'll break your cane if you go beforehand and you're not getting one of the hospital's wheelchairs."

"Fifteen minutes? I'm sure we could find something more interesting to do in that time than – "

"House!"

"Okay, okay! Fine!" House slowly turns his back on her. "But just so you know, next time you decide to punish me by making me stand in the corner, I'll be bringing magazines. Better yet, you could give me a lap dance. It's only fair that you provide entertainment."

Cuddy rolls her eyes and returns to her desk, taking a seat behind it.

She grins when she sees the crowd of doctors and nurses lined up outside her office with their thumbs up.

_fin._


	14. Can't It Wait?

**_Can't It Wait?_**

"There's no time!"

"But!"

"We have to go."

"My show has only two minutes left. Can't it wait?"

"Oh, sure. It can wait. Your water broke, but d'you want me to talk to it while you finish watching?"

"She's not an 'it'!"

"No, it's a human being. A girl. Who up until ten seconds ago I thought you were dying to meet."

"I am! I just…"

"Let's go!"

Cuddy stares longingly at the TV and then sighs. She allows House to help her stand and they awkwardly head for the door, using each other for support.

"Let's have this kid."

_fin._


	15. Wouldn't Dream Of It

_(slight adult themes)_

**_Wouldn't Dream Of It_**

"You fixed me up a bubble bath?" she asks. "That was very…thoughtful of you."

"I thought so," he smirks.

She stares at him. Blinks. "Why?"

"Why what?"

"Why draw me a bubble bath, House? I'm assuming there's a reason for it other than you going completely out of your mind."

"Let's just put it this way," he explains. "Bath equals naked. Naked equals good. Me like good."

She rolls her eyes. "You really have gone insane if you expect me to take a bubble bath, naked, with you."

"With clothes is fine, too," he suggests. "Wet t-shirts can be fun."

"In your dreams." Flat.

"Sometimes, yes, but mostly in my dreams it's without the shirt."

"Well, of course." She can't help but smile a little.

He edges closer to her and waggles his eyebrows. "So, how about it?"

She almost says 'no' straight up but sees the bubble bath – it looks so good – and then the look of lust upon House's face – he really wants this (her heart skips a beat) – and she sighs.

"Fine," she says, "but don't even think about trying to soap me up or wash me."

He grins and tears off his shirt. "Wouldn't dream of it."

_fin._


	16. That Skirt

**_That Skirt_**

"Never thought I'd be saying this, but I think you're right."

Cuddy's lip twitches into a thoughtful but amused smirk. She narrows her eyes slightly. "Oooh, is the high and mighty Dr House admitting he's wrong?" she taunts.

He puffs his cheeks out in exasperation and he glares at her. Hangs his head. Doesn't speak.

"Well? Am I right? Are you actually, for the first time in…as long as I can remember…giving the credit rightfully to someone who isn't you?"

"_Actually_," he throws back, "I wasn't talking about the case."

She looks at him in confusion. "What are you – "

"That skirt," he says, interrupting.

"What about it?"

He limps towards the door and turns to stare at her. His eyes crinkle tellingly at the corners. "It _does_ make your arse look big."

She sighs loudly as he makes his exit before she can protest and disappears from sight. Glancing down at the file, she scans its contents. Her smile returns. "Ha! I _was_ right."

_fin._


	17. All There Is To It

_(adult themes!)_

**_All There Is To It_**

"I think you and Cuddy are having sex," Wilson tells House one day when he barges in.

House stops short and stares at him. He swallows. Smiles a careful, mysterious smile. "And I think you have a thing for Cameron."

Wilson doesn't say any more but there's a glint in his eyes.

"As for sleeping with Cuddy," House deadpans, "I wish."

By the look Wilson is giving him, this isn't over.

* * *

"I think you and Cuddy are definitely doing it," Wilson says with much more confidence, days later. He crosses his arms over his chest, fixes House with accusing eyes.

"What makes you think that?" House.

Wilson quirks an eyebrow at him. "_Who_ makes me thing that actually. The answer to that would be you. And Cuddy."

He has no suitable comeback, so storms out.

* * *

"I think you and Cuddy are doing more than sleeping with each other," Wilson says a month later.

"More than – " House offers a puzzled look. "Not this again!"

"You're sleeping together," Wilson ventures, "but that's not all there is to it."

"What is there to it, then?" Annoyed.

Wilson just smiles.

_fin._


	18. Into The Fire

**_Into The Fire_**

It's everywhere. Red, crimson. Fire. Burning. Pain.

She can't tell which way will lead her to safety, doesn't know which direction to go in. She is trapped, surrounded and utterly at a loss at what to do. Her throat is slick with smoke.

"House?"

She calls his name, an instinct. The moment his name leaves her lips she frowns. Stupid! Stupid, stupid, stupid. What would he be doing amongst the flames? He was the one who started it, she is certain.

Still, she can't help but call for him again.

"House!"

She almost jumps when he replies.

"Cuddy?"

She watches as he walks toward her, moving through the fire as if it isn't there. She frowns. "House! What the hell? You'll get burned!"

He continues onward, doesn't so much as flinch.

She watches in silent awe as he makes it to her, unscathed. He places a hand on her arm. "Let's go," he says. He begins to lead them back the way he came.

Into the fire.

She swallows, looks at him, shakes her head.

"You trust me, don't you?" he asks quietly.

There is something in his eyes that makes her say 'yes'.

"Then let's go."

Slowly, they edge their way forward. She takes a tentative step into the flames and is shocked when she feels nothing. There is no pain. There is no burning sensation as the flames lick at her feet.

There is only the feeling of movement, moving forwards.

They reach the other side in minutes though it feels much longer.

Air. Cool. Fresh. Alive. They're alive. They didn't get burned.

She sighs in relief and turns to look at House. She leans up to him, places a chaste kiss on the corner of his mouth. "Thank you," she says simply.

He shrugs as if he doesn't deserve her thanks. "You're the one who walked through the fire."

_fin._


	19. In The Candlelight

**_In The Candlelight_**

"Moving on to arson now?"

House glanced up from the curl of smoke rising from the candle in his hand to scowl at her.

She smiled pleasantly back.

"What do you want?"

"I have a case for you. Young girl had a heart attack."

"Well, that's a head scratcher. It sounds like she's already been diagnosed."

"She's seven years old."

He raised an eyebrow and let his gaze drop back to the flame. It flickered gently and then straightened back up.

"Fine. Give me the file," he muttered, holding his free hand out.

She did but not without commenting. "Wow, I thought you'd take more convincing than that."

She spoke too soon.

The edge of the file was soon curling into itself as House doused it in the candlelight.

"Ooops?" he said, offering her a cocky grin.

She hurriedly reached out and pulled what was left of the file from his grasp. She dropped it on the floor and wincing, stamped out the flames. Goodbye, new shoes.

"Well then," she said. "I guess I was right about the arson."

_fin._


	20. Tin Man

**_Tin Man_**

"House."

"Yes?"

"Why the hell are you dressed up as a Knight?"

"Who, me?"

"Do you see any other idiot wandering around in clothing made of tin?"

"Funny." Sarcastic.

"Well, do you?"

House pretends to search the room. "Unless you're wearing panties made of tin, I think it's safe to say I'm the only Knight here."

Cuddy quirks an eyebrow. "Panties made of tin?"

"What?" Innocent.

She shakes her head as if it'll help remove the image his words have brought up and crosses her arms. "Why the costume, House? Is this another of your games to put your new so-called 'team' off?"

He doesn't answer but heads for the door, pushing past Wilson who's on his way in.

"House?" she calls after him.

Nothing.

She turns to Wilson who's wearing an amused smirk. "It appears that your Knight in shining armour just left you hanging. Again."

She glares at him and then sighs. "Figures."

_fin._


	21. An Invisible Thread

**_An Invisible Thread_**

'_I want to run_

_But only far enough to make you miss me'_

~ Broken Man (Boys Like Girls)

* * *

"I need space."

"You have space."

"I need more space. I need to not see you for awhile."

His heart plummets in his chest.

He scowls at her.

"Fine."

* * *

He pulls back.

Gives her space.

Gives her what she's asked him for.

Every step he takes carries him further away from her and is a step he feels compelled to take back.

He doesn't let himself take any of them back.

* * *

A bigger part of him wants to run to her rather than from her, but she has spoken. She wants some time without him. He is kind (smart) enough to give her that. He doesn't want to push her even further out of his reach. He doesn't want to lose her like he almost lost Wilson.

And so he runs but only far enough to make her miss him.

He knows that she will miss him. He knows it. He has no doubt that she will. It is their way.

* * *

They have formed a bond over the years, a connection, that has tied them to each other with an invisible thread. Since that tie was made it had been put to the test many times and it has withheld all that has been thrown at it. It has if anything only deepened what they is between them. What they still have.

Surely it will hold through this. Surely.

* * *

He watches her from afar. Awaits her next move. Scoffs at how wasted the space that now surrounds her is.

He should be there. He should be in the empty space beside her.

That is his place and without him there to fill it, she is only a shadow of her usual self.

* * *

There's a knock at his door. At first he doesn't answer but it is persistent. It won't stop.

He gives in.

"What?"

"I miss you."

"You miss me?"

"As crazy as it sounds – and I can't believe I'm saying this – yes. Will you come back?"

* * *

He pretends to think about it. He pretends he doesn't want to say 'yes'. Frowns.

He slowly drops his gaze to the floor.

"Will things go back to how they were before?"

She looks at him, startled.

Reaches for him, wraps her arms around him and pulls him close.

"No," she whispers into his ear. "They'll be better."

He nods. "Okay."

_fin._


	22. Loneliness

_A/N: Tag to 'Joy'._

_**Loneliness**_

When it comes to relationships, she is just as screwed up as he says she is. She knows it. He is right about her. He is completely right.

She is miserable and she can't for the life of her form a long and lasting relationship with anyone outside of her blood relatives and her staff.

Hell, if she was able she wouldn't be alone right now. She'd be with her partner and her child.

Her child.

She'd have her own family.

She doesn't have that. She doesn't have her own family.

And all around her, the silence is killing her.

_fin._


	23. Lies And Illusions

_A/N: Tag to 5x05 'Lucky Thirteen'._

**_Lies And Illusions_**

_I heard that evil comes disguised_

_Like a city of angels_

_I'm walking towards the light_

_~ The River (Good Charlotte)_

He knows people.

They lie. They deceive. They spin falsehoods for their own benefit.

Everybody lies.

It's a fact of nature, a way of survival.

He expects no less.

He is therefore unprepared for the rush of emotion, of misery and betrayal, that hits him when he finds out that Cuddy is getting a baby.

She didn't directly lie to him per say but in not telling him what she was doing, it was essentially the same thing. She had left him out of the loop. She hadn't included him.

He'd had to find out through Wilson - who'd initially helped her to hold this illusion over him before letting him in.

Lies. Essentially, that's what they were.

He finds himself staring at his reflection in the glass window before him, wondering just how much of his existence is built on lies.

_fin._


	24. Disastrous Outcomes

_A/N: Written from the spoilers for '5x10 Let Them Eat Cake'. On another note, if you're interested, I've written a fic inspired by the promo pics for 'Big Baby'. It's called "You And I" and is posted separately under my account. I may or may not continue it depending on interest. ;)_

**_Disastrous Outcomes (aka Why Not To Cop A Feel Of Your Boss)_**

He might as well have laid their relationship to rest. He might as well have buried it deep down beneath the decaying soils of the local cemetery, flattened the top with a shovel to compact the dirt.

Of course it would have been disastrous if he _hadn't_ copped a feel. It would have meant displaying his emotions, how he really feels, and god knows that can only be a bad thing. Nothing good has ever ocme of allowing the most private of his feelings to surface.

The only other option was to have flat out lied to her and that again would have killed his chance of actually having something with Cuddy. He'd be in exactly the same situation, pondering the outcome he was now living.

Their 'war' was at a shocking standstill because of him.

Their war.

Of course!

He'd been planning on reconstructing Cuddy's office in retaliation to her removing all of his furniture. Perhaps instead he could use it to his advantage, to show her without all those humiliating words exactly what he felt.

Yes. Yes, that was brilliant.

He smiled as he recalled the desk Cuddy had in storage from Med school…

_fin._


	25. Incoherent Nothings

_A/N: Based off spoilers from 1x10 'Let Them Eat Cake'._

_**Incoherent Nothings**_

He is standing close in front of her. Too close. She can feel the warmth radiating from his body to hers and can feel the heat of his breath on her face, on her neck, down her blouse.

Though he isn't touching her, her skin is very aware of his presence. He might as well be running his hands over every inch of her body. Fine goose bumps dot her flesh.

His eyes are as intense as always – if not more so – as he stares at her and seems almost to challenge her. She is afraid that she will drown in their beautiful blue depths and she will be lost, never to be found again.

Her breath catches in her throat as he inches even closer and her skin prickles in anticipation. She is once more aware of the heat, dripping, melting like wax.

And then he smirks. One of his hands has somehow ended up on her left breast.

Her thoughts meld into incoherent nothings that are swept away in lieu of the feeling of his hand on her. She shivers – his touch is electricity with a dash of winter thrown in.

She opens her mouth to protest (they shouldn't be doing this, not here!) but all that escapes her lips is a wanton moan.

He removes his hand though it is clear that he is enjoying it as much as she.

Her mind begins to build itself back up to its normal standard and she manages barely to utter his name. "House."

He winks at her, glances toward the door to his, no their (at least for the day) office. He flicks his eyes back to her.

"A preview of things to come," he suggests wickedly.

She very nearly jumps him on the spot.

_fin._


	26. Dizzy

_A/N: Tag to 5x09 "Last Resort"._

_**Dizzy**_

Her head spins. Around her everything is a blur. All that she can make out in the blend of faces is an image that is not before her.

House.

The second delivery of drugs she had made to him for the gunman keeps playing over and over again in her mind. The first time was bad enough but at least then he'd not been so scarily silent. He'd been his usual self then. He'd been House.

The second time however, the concern, the worry, so fresh in his eyes, naked for her to see if only for that moment is enough to haunt her thoughts and send her stomach reeling.

The words they didn't exchange (the words that should have been said _in case_) are a mantra in her head.

The way her fingertips brushes his hand as she took the files from him is imprinted into her memory. (She wants to hold him in her arms, for this to be all over. She wants to pummel him for getting into this mess in the first place, until she can no longer feel her fists.)

She longs to sit down, to give in to the urge to let her knees buckle beneath her but everything in her screams not to. She has to do what she can, to see this through until the end. This is her hospital, her duty, though anyone else would deny that.

And House.

She has to be strong if not to hold her professional image then for him. It's doubtful he'll respond to the gesture but at least it will soothe the aching in her heart. At least she'll know if this doesn't work out for the best that she did everything she could.

She closes her eyes, takes a deep breath and counts to three.

One.

Two.

Three.

She opens her eyes to the blinding reality before her; she feels no less dizzy and vulnerable than earlier.

_fin._


	27. Been Thinking

_A/N: Tag to 5x17 The Itch._

_**Been Thinking**_

He has literally climbed back onto his motorcycle when he decides he must go back. He must follow through. He can't just leave now that he's come this far, as tempting as it is.

For a moment, he leans awkwardly on the bike, not quite sitting and not quite standing. His brow knits together as his eyes are drawn back to the window to where she sits.

Cuddy. It's all her fault.

It is because of her that he is in such a state. It is her fault he can't think in a straight line anymore. Her fault.

It's her fault that he can't think about any topic that doesn't include her for more than five minutes.

He climbs off his bike, limps for her door and before he can change his mind, he knocks.

"House." The door swings open in less than a minute. She pierces him with her big blue eyes and he is done for, not that he'll tell her that. "What are you doing here?"

He swallows and forces himself to retain eye contact. "I've been thinking," he says simply.

Her eyes widen slightly. She tilts her head back, inhales and exhales and then steps aside. Waving him in, she doesn't take her eyes off of him even as she shuts the door behind him to block out the rest of the world.

_fin._


	28. At Another Crossroad

_**At Another Crossroad**_

It wasn't the first time that he'd been at a crossroad as significant as this one, with multiple choices laid out right in front of him, awaiting his decision on which one he wanted to take. He had in fact been there numerous times in his life, each time differing in circumstance and possible outcome.

Some might say that life was made up of irregularities, but House knew better. He saw the patterns imprinted almost unnoticeably beneath the surface that very few could see. He saw the undeniable traces of what was real and what was merely an illusion ripping through the fabric of his very existence. He saw it all.

Putting it all simply, he knew that he had to choose. He had to make a decision. If he left it too late, the opportunity would pass him by and life would go on until he hit another intersection that would predictably consist of unique roads to follow that somehow managed to stay in the same intertwining pattern as those before it.

He knew there was no way to reason with or to slow it down and the only decision on his part was to take or leave what was being offered. He would get no other input on the matter. Weighing his options against each other and acting on what felt right was all he could do.

He looked straight into Cuddy's eyes, admiring their intense blue. He managed a smile, as small as it turned out to be. And then he told her.

"As great as that sounds, I think I'll pass."

_fin._


	29. Love Isn’t Easy

_**Love Isn't Easy**_

"Love isn't that easy."

"L…love? What has love got to do with this? Any of this?"

House gapes at her, his mouth open.

He didn't mean to say that.

He really didn't.

He is certain by the way she is looking at him that she can sense that.

His heart rate increases.

"I…nothing," he says firmly. "It's got nothing to do with – "

"No, House. Are you saying that you…love me?"

"No! God, no. Why would I say that?" His words lack conviction. "Devil woman," he mutters to strengthen his point.

She stares at him.

He squeezes his eyes shut, hoping for it to all be a dream.

He opens them again.

"Not a dream."

"Huh?"

"Never mind."

"House. Just…what's going on? Is this…is us…" She pauses, frowns. "What's going on?"

"Well," he says, "you said to 'forget about it, you're not changing your mind', I said 'love isn't that easy' and then awkwardness ensued from there."

"I know what _happened_, I just… You _love _me?"

He hangs his head, frowns at her. "The point is I can't just forget what you did. I can't. No matter how many extra perks you give to me in the bedroom to make me forgive you, I – "

"House!"

"I can't," he finishes. His voice is firm.

"House, seriously. All I said was that I moved Coma Guy to a new room."

"A room without cable TV."

"A room that is better suited to his needs."

"Exactly."

She continues to pierce him with her intense blue eyes. She sucks her bottom lip into her mouth and squints at him. "You _love_ me?"

He sighs heavily in exasperation. "Oh brother."

_fin._


	30. The Prognosis

_**The Prognosis**_

The distance between them is too great. There is too much space and too much air between them. Metal equipment and beeping noises fill the room. She longs for his touch, just the soft weight of his hand on her shoulder, and hopes that her eyes can convey what she is feeling. It really shouldn't matter as much.

He stares back at her but his eyes are wide and unseeing. He doesn't know what emotions are passing over her face and never will he know again if this treatment doesn't work. She forces her eyes from his to look at Chase. Chase is silent, his mouth a thin line.

She looks away. "How is he?" She has checked his stats herself over and over again but she can't help but ask. She needs confirmation. She needs to know that she is seeing what is truly there rather than a figment of her imagination.

Chase's blank look slowly changes. His lips curl up into a small but warm smile. "He's going to be fine."

Relieved as she is to hear Chase's words, the expanse between herself and House continues to eat at her. She reaches for his hand. Footsteps retreat behind her. "House?" She swallows. "House. Can you hear me?"

She watches him as his chest rises and falls; he doesn't respond.

A half hour later Wilson arrives and she hasn't moved. He pulls out a chair for her and she sets in for a long night.

_FIN._


	31. With Trepidation

_**With Trepidation**_

Their hearts have been shattered by their pasts. So much has gone by, so much has happened to them, that to find a part of them that isn't broken is rare. The situations they have lived through shaped them into whom they are now and while painful, they cannot move forwards without looking back.

It is with trepidation that they take the next step.

She knocks on his door.

He lets her in.

She tells him what's on her mind: that he's being an ass and to let her help him for once.

He stares solemnly back until he can't take it anymore and nods his head.

She watches him.

He watches her.

Eyes connect.

"You want to kiss me, don't you?" she says. It's not a question. She knows he wants to kiss her. He wants to do so much more than kiss her. What he wants to do to her cannot be adequately put into words.

His eyes are soft as he answers. "I always want to kiss you."

Her heart skips a beat.

He moves closer to her.

She gives into fear; she leans forwards and closes the distance between them.

Their worlds collide and trepidation is pushed aside for the moment.

Both know it won't last.

_fin._


	32. Under Her Skin

**_Under Her Skin_**

It's difficult for her to understand why she feels for him as she does. He's definitely not the nicest man she knows – quite the opposite, in fact – and he is nothing and yet everything that she's ever dreamed of. He has passion that with her own sends jolts of electricity through her body, sometimes so intense it hurts and sometimes so it makes her heart skip a beat. Whatever the outcome, it always burns her.

His sharp mind and sharper tongue have similarly conflicting reactions within her. No one can taunt her like he can. He knows just the right words to ruin her day and he knows her better than most, a thing he uses to his advantage. He digs and jabs into her and rips her apart. Torturous as it may be she lives for the next time he toys with her in such a way. She aches for it. Of course she is not entirely an open book to him. There are things that he doesn't know about her that she likes to think only she is aware of.

Somehow though, he is entranced by her and he continues to peel at the thin layers she's been able to hold onto and delves deeper and deeper under her skin. He is on a path that she is certain will lead him to all the answers. Biting remarks and challenges can only rattle him and keep him off track for so long. Eventually he will break through the veil she's holding up and the last of the mysteries of her life will be on display for him to reach out and stain with the lengths of his deft fingers.

He will swirl her life story around in his mind until his thoughts are clear and he can use it against her. His powers he will use for evil, to get his own way. Those stunning blue eyes that mask his every idea will continue to send winged creatures into her stomach and bees after her soul. His touch will freeze her and his words will burn her.

It's difficult to comprehend why out of all the men in the world she wants him. It seems his sole purpose in life is to bring her down to his level. All he seems interested in doing is inflicting the same pain upon her that he feels from his infarction and the emotion turmoil he keeps inside. There are few smiles shared. There is little support on his side and there is no future for them.

And yet she can't help it. Her feelings for him drive her onwards and keep her from sinking. As masochistic as it sounds, he is the one thing on this Earth that has the ability to send her reeling and keep her grounded. He is her counterpart and her opponent and she'll have it no other way.

_fin._


	33. Birthday Card

**Birthday Card**

He notices she acts strangely on his birthday, almost avoiding him at times. When he mocks her ability as a doctor she returns an insult but it doesn't hold the same weight behind it. Her heart isn't in it. Usually he wouldn't mind that so much. It would mean he'd get his way. But this time, he can tell. Something is going on that he doesn't know about.

He barges into her office with that thought in mind and lets his cane clap loudly on the floor a few times. "Packing on the pounds, hmm?" he greets her. It's a lie. In fact he's certain she's lost weight recently. The intent behind his words is to get a reaction. Any words will do.

"House, go away," she says.

"House, go away," he says back.

"I mean it. Don't you have work to do?"

His eyes light up and the corner of his mouth twitches into a smirk as he takes a step closer to her. "I mean it. Don't you have work to do?"

"House is going to do extra clinic hours this week."

"He is not," he disagrees.

There's a rustling sound as she flips through a file and then the slap of it hitting her desk. "House. What do you want?"

"I want what every guy wants," he answers flippantly. He reaches her desk and a pen holder catches his attention. Picking it up gingerly between two fingers he fiddles with it. "Bike, booze, a few hookers." He trails off and his fingers pause on the pen holder.

"What do you want from me?"

"Well I have a bike," he says. "You could buy me booze. Or better yet, are you interested in a new job title? I'm sure you would do great!"

"Funny." She flicks a strand of hair back from her face.

Shrugging, he lets a smile spread across his face. "Why are you avoiding me?"

"I'm not avoiding you. Avoiding you would mean I would be some place that isn't here. Which sadly I am not." Another file in her grasp, she pierces him with her eyes.

"You're acting strangely. Something is different with you today." He twirls his cane. "I'm thinking it has to do with my birthday."

She swallows and says nothing.

"I'm right, aren't I?"

"House-"

"I am! So what is it? Do you have something against me turning a year older? Do you feel left out? I could give you a present if you are," he teases.

"No! Of course not. I-"

"Trashed my birthday card again?"

"Again? How did you know-?"

He smirks. "I have my ways."

Tapping her desk lightly with the tip of his cane, he gives a short nod and turns. "My desk could use some more paperwork," he hints. "And I don't mean the work kind of paperwork so much as other non-work paper. Cameron gets the work stuff."

"Hmmm." With an almost puzzled look, she considers him. "Maybe there'll be some of that non-work paper on your desk after lunch then."

He smiles once his back is turned and he's on his way out the door.

_fin._


	34. Where The End Is

_**Where The End Is**_

_Do you know where the end is?_

_Do you think you can see it?_

'_Say (All I Need)' by One Republic_

He wants her. It's as simple as that. He wants her in a primal, must-have-her way and in a soft and gentle, can't-go-on-without-her-in-his-life way. She has saved him many times over in many different ways and in the process she has captured his heart and incarcerated it. He's tried to get it back from her. He has taunted her and insulted her and tried to hurt her, but still she holds onto it and he can't make himself go that extra few steps and do something bad enough that she'll hate him and release his heart back to him forevermore.

When it comes down to it, she won't set him free. Only he can do that and only he can break away from the cycle they've grown to live for. No one else. It scares him that as much as it kills him, playing this game, he doesn't want it to end. He needs her.

_fin._


	35. An Itch

_**An Itch**_

"House?

"Hmm?

"What the hell are you doing?"

She stares at him across the exam room. From the doorway she can see clearly that his hands are down his pants and his expression is cloudy.

He raises his eyes to meet hers. Unashamedly. "If you don't know what I'm doing, you have more serious issues than I thought." He smirks. "Had a little itch downstairs," he adds.

She swallows.

"Care to help me out with it?

She wants to say 'no' - that this isn't' the time or the place - but she can't help herself.

She smiles mischievously. "Do I ever." She waits for his smirk... and then she turns and leaves.

_fin._


	36. Nothin'

_**Nothin'**_

The ghost of a smile graces his lips. Why it is there, she does not know, but it sends a warm feeling to the pit of her stomach.

She quirks an eyebrow and allows a small smile onto her own face. She looks at him; her eyes of liquid blue collide with his cornflower blue eyes.

"What're you smiling at?" she asks softly, running the fingers of one hand down his arm.

Her breathing is relaxed, slow, and her mind is still a little foggy from sleep. Touching his skin sets her senses on fire.

He lifts one shoulder in a shrug and hurriedly wipes clear the smile and switches to an indifferent expression. He breaks eye contact to stare at the sheets covering his body.

"Nothin'," he replies quietly. His face scrunches up into a soft frown.

She narrows her eyes at him, continues to study him.

Nothing.

He was smiling at nothing.

She almost teases him about it but decides rather to get up. It's almost time for work.

As she's picking up her clothes from various places on the floor and over his furniture, she catches him smiling again. She says nothing, but smiles back and shakes her head softly.

"Goodbye, House," she tells him. "I'll see you later at work."

The, "exam room 3 at lunchtime," that he mutters back only makes her smile wider.

_fin._


	37. Bottle

_**Bottle**_

"Where is it?" The door swings shut behind him, enclosing his fury in the confines of her office. His face is contorted, frustrated and he's looking straight at her as if he can see into her soul. Lucky her.

"Where's what?" she replies breezily. She very pointedly quirks an eyebrow.

"My," he says firmly, "Vicodin! I need it. My leg-"

"Is in pain, I know." Without another word, she stands, leaving her paperwork on her desk, and one by one, closes the curtains and hides her office from anyone who may pass by and happen to glance in that direction.

He stares at her as if she has gone mad. "You swapped my Vicodin with tic tacs! Did it not occur to you that I would find out the second I took one out?"

"Actually I was counting on you finding out. You took longer than I expected to come and complain about it though. I'm shocked."

"Where is it?"

She smiles at him and shoves a hand into the pocket of her pants. "Relax. They're right here." She tosses him a bottle. It rattles as it flies through the air and he expertly catches it.

He fixes her with a confused stare and pops the lid, shaking two pills into his hand. He downs them and replaces the lid. He turns to leave.

"Wait."

He pauses but doesn't look at her.

"Don't you want to know why I closed the curtains?"

"No." Despite his answer he doesn't leave.

"Fine. I'll tell you anyway." She moves silently toward him and stands behind him. Her hands tentatively reach out; one goes to his waist, the other she runs down his back. He shivers slightly under her touch at first but warms to her and exhales loudly.

Slowly he shifts around to face her. He is stopped, speechless, by the look in her eyes.

"House, I..." she begins. She frowns.

What else is there to say? What can she say to him that she hasn't already?

She gives herself a moment and gazes into the soft and yet brilliant blue of his eyes. She can feel every fibre of her existence humming like an engine or a computer running quietly in the background.

His breath is warm on her face.

She takes a lungful of air and then dives in. She kisses him full on the mouth, her hands tangling in his soft but course hair. He responds only when the shock wears off - about three seconds later.

She smiles against his lips. "House," she says, pulling back. "I can't believe you fell for that." Triumphantly, she held up the bottle of pills she had given him, and taken back when they had been kissing, and pockets it.

He glares at her. "You did all this just to... Why did you give me them in the first place?"

She shrugged and walked over to her desk. Once she was sitting down, she smiled up at him. "You've had two Vicodin now. That should last you for at least til this evening. Talk to me after then."

_fin._


	38. Unleashed

_**Unleashed**_

It's a screwed to hell, dysfunctional idea that maybe things can work out between them. Even so, it's been a long time coming. Some might even say an attempt at a relationship is well overdue. They'd not be wrong.

There has been a passion simmering just beneath the surface of their relationship for years now. Since they met, actually. A fiery passion, that even after all this time has not burned out.

Maybe they spent more of that time fighting than anything, but there were other emotions there and though previously it was a mutual decision to keep those feelings to themselves, now they have broken free. Unleashed. Free to turn their worlds inside out and upside down. Potentially disastrous.

All the same, the feelings feel so good. They can no longer be denied. And whether things will work out between them or not, one thing is certain. They are in for a bumpy ride and almost definitely, misery.

But then, maybe that's exactly what they need. Humanity thrives on conflict. They thrive on conflict. And misery loves company. It all balances out.

And hell if they're not going to give this thing a go. They owe it to themselves to at least try.

_fin._


	39. Hollow Promises

_**Hollow Promises**_

"Do you really hate House that much?" Cuddy crossed her arms over her chest; her lips formed a thin line. The cuffs on her jacket stretched against her arms.

"I don't hate House," Lucas replied. "He's an ass. We both know it. But I don't hate him. That said I don't understand why you get so involved with him sometimes. He's a grown man, Lisa. He can look after himself."

"Oh, no he can't. Lucas, you know what he's like-"

"Yeah, I do."

"So why are you arguing with me?"

"This relationship – you, me – if it's going to go anywhere further, I need to know. Is there anything between you and House?" His back straightened and he seemed to exist only in that moment in order to hear her response.

Cuddy swallowed. "No! Of course not. We're friends and colleagues. We look out for each other. That's all."

Lucas gives her a look.

"I promise there's nothing going on," Cuddy stated. "Cross my heart."

"I hope you're right. I'd hate to lose you." Lucas reached for her and guided her with a hand on her waist to the couch beside him. When she was nearly in his lap, smiling softly, he kissed her.

"This is what I want," she whispered. The words sounded hollow even to her own ears.

_fin._


End file.
